
Piers Morgan and Gary Lineker clash over Vardy after Arsenal bid
Burn Baby, burn…
10 years ago
Nooruddean Choudry

Piers Morgan and Gary Lineker clash over Vardy after Arsenal bid
Burn Baby, burn…
10 years ago

‘The Greatest’ Muhammad Ali has been placed on life support
The Greatest
10 years ago

Arsenal have triggered Jamie Vardy’s release clause
Arsene’s having a party
10 years ago

Here’s how to order or download some of the most beautiful Euro 2016 wall charts around
Some of these designs are beautiful…and free!
10 years ago

Jamie Vardy’s wife calls his lookalike a ‘stalker’ and explains why he had to be blocked
That escalated quickly. Just a few weeks ago, Jamie Vardy and Leicester City were celebrating one of the most thrilling and unexpected title wins in the history of the game. There was wide-scale jubilation and it seemed as if everyone in the land was joining in the fun and merriment. One of the surprise stars […]
10 years ago

Everyone laughs at ISIS Euros threat rather than give in to fear
There are two ways of dealing with terror. You can either give the terrorists exactly what they desire, and cower in fear and panic, or you can remain resolute and undeterred. They want you to worry; they hope to fuck up your plans. What they don’t want under any circumstances is to be ridiculed. If there is […]
10 years ago

Will Mourinho get the p*ss taken out of him for doing a classic Rodgers?
You’ve got to feel for Brendan Rodgers. It seems that no matter what he says or does, he just gets the piss ripped out of him by everyone. The 43-year-old was unveiled as the new manager of Celtic recently, and the first reaction of many was to mock, mainly for his assertion that Celtic are […]
10 years ago

Louis van Gaal spotted looking happy and well in the sunny Algarve
Good old Louis. Although Manchester United fans are understandably ecstatic about the long-awaited appointment of Jose Mourinho as their new manager, their feelings towards Louis van Gaal seem to have softened markedly over the last week or so. We are delighted to announce Jose Mourinho is our new manager! Full statement: https://t.co/PDiHMIWnpd #WelcomeJose pic.twitter.com/eZ8NBSz2up — […]
10 years ago

Mourinho merchandise: Products that Man United could use Jose’s image rights for
It’s a sign of the times. With salary and terms agreed, and willingness from all parties to conclude the deal as soon as possible, the final stumbling block to Jose Mourinho being appointed the new manager of Manchester United was of course image rights. Wow. All the Jose Mourinho trademarks owned by Chelsea. Includes lipsticks, lingerie, […]
10 years ago

We asked you for your favourite gangster movie – and it wasn’t ‘The Godfather’
So many classics to choose from, to be fair.
10 years ago

Channel 4’s ‘Secret Life Of Human Pups’ had everyone asking the same question
A dog’s life.
10 years ago

Matt LeBlanc may have just blown this sh*t wide open by unmasking the Stig
He was a little bit too Keen on social media.
10 years ago

Why the 2000s were the worst decade for men’s fashion…ever
The eighties get a raw deal. It’s the most referenced decade when referring to fashion fuck-ups – particularly for men. Everyone points to the New Romantic movement, or Wham! and yet those styles slowly came back in. And let’s not forget how cool the likes of Michael J. Fox, Eddie Murphy and Matthew Broderick looked back in the day. […]
10 years ago

7 signs you’re seriously addicted to your smartphone
You get low battery anxiety…
10 years ago

Mourinho’s Man United: Which of the current crop make the grade
Jose Mourinho and Manchester United. It’s a potentially explosive mix. The Portuguese brings with him an exemplary CV and undoubted charisma. He also drags along more baggage than Mariah Carey on a short tour of Europe. So much could go wrong, but it is such an irresistible prospect that it had to happen one day. The […]
10 years ago

Snapchat are now selling cinema tickets in their latest new venture
This could make going to the pictures as easy as a few swipes of your finger. Not content with their domination of the selfie market, Snapchat are now entering the movie business…or the cinema business at least. They want to become the box office in your pocket by selling you tickets for the big screen […]
10 years ago

Snapchat to become more like Instagram in major redesign next month
Snapping out of it.
10 years ago

East 17, 5ive, and Alesha Dixon to feature in bizarre pro-Brexit concert
Don’t Stay Another Day
10 years ago

Woodward and Van Gaal – An EXCLUSIVE (and possibly fake) transcript of their final meeting
The manager now knows his fate. Despite the rest of the world being aware of the rumours since Saturday, Louis van Gaal was only informed of his sacking on Monday morning. The 64-year-old and his entire Dutch coaching team have been ditched, and they are said to be livid. According to reports, they had already started preparing for next season. Here […]
10 years ago

LMA lawyer arrives at Man United to negotiate Van Gaal’s departure
It’s happening. Louis van Gaal is leaving Manchester United. Reports of the 64-year-old’s departure from Old Trafford started up as soon as the final whistle was blown on the Red Devils’ FA Cup final victory on Saturday. Since then, rumours of Van Gaal leaving United, and being replaced by former protege Jose Mourinho, have gone […]
10 years ago

New law this week means the end of ‘legal highs’
Not everyone thinks it’s a good thing.
10 years ago

Man United mole reveals Van Gaal tracked players’ emails
Alpha email
10 years ago

Vardy is so angry with himself for missing the target that he punches his own face
There is being a perfectionist, and there’s this. England notched up another victory in the run-up to the European Championships on Sunday by overcoming a stubborn Turkish side 2-1 at the Etihad Stadium. It wasn’t quite the scintillating display that the Manchester crowd were hoping for, but in fairness to Roy Hodgson, he only has a […]
10 years ago

Man United move quickly to clarify Van Gaal’s “It’s over” comments
They’re fighting a losing battle. It seems that Manchester United’s press office are working overtime trying to put out fires in the media. Since the moment that Saturday’s FA Cup was won, manager Louis van Gaal’s future has been the subject of huge debate and rumour. All the major news agency ran the story that […]
10 years ago

Mourinho stories may be cruel on Van Gaal, but at least we’re saved all the tedious bickering
Worse than fishwives. If you’re not familiar with the 18th Century stereotype, women who sold fish in the days of yore were lumped with something of an unfortunate reputation. It was one of loud, foul-tongued blabbermouths who loved collecting other people’s gossip and spreading it around to all and sundry. Now that may seem horribly sexist by […]
10 years ago

Louis van Gaal tell Sky Sports: “It’s over”
The end is nigh. Manchester United fans who have hoped and prayed for months that Louis van Gaal would leave the club and be replaced by Jose Mourinho now seem strangely gripped with sympathy for the big Dutchman. Reports emerged minutes after United’s FA Cup win on Saturday that Jose Mourinho was set to be […]
10 years ago

Watch Sir Alex Ferguson taking the p*ss out of Tinie Tempah’s jacket before the Cup Final
You know you’re in trouble when a 74-year-old is ripping into your threads. Tinie Tempah’s performance prior to the FA Cup final on Saturday may not have been to everyone’s taste, but Sir Alex Ferguson seemed more pre-occupied with the rapper’s shiny garb. The FA have shared fascinating pre-game footage from Wembley’s ‘tunnelcam’ via their YouTube channel, and […]
10 years ago

Why Manchester United and X-Men: Apocalypse are the perfect match
One’s a sprawling, expensive mess. The other is the new X-Men movie.
10 years ago

Joey Tribbiani as a dad? Check out Matt LeBlanc’s new US sitcom
Forget Top Gear, this is the Matt LeBlanc we know and love. The former star of Friends may be about to front the new series of the motor show alongside Chris Evans, but it’s his 12-year stint in the New York-based sitcom that remains his most celebrated work to date. Alongside Jennifer Aniston, Courteney Cox, Lisa […]
10 years ago

These fans seem to think Klopp is overrated after Europa League defeat
Klopped up
10 years ago

Fans are excited about the possibility of Celtic and Rangers joining English football
Could the Old Firm finally be coming to England? With the news that the Football League plan to introduce an extra division from the start of the 2019/20 season – resulting in an increase from 92 teams to a round 100 – there are renewed hopes that Celtic and Rangers could be two of the eight new sides. Both […]
10 years ago

Plane debris from EgyptAir flight found, Egyptian military and airline confirms
Here’s what we know about the search for the missing plane.
10 years ago

Rival fans all mock the same crying Liverpool fan after Europa League heartache
People can be so cruel. Liverpool’s Europa League dream came crashing down before their eyes on Wednesday in a wretched second-half display in Basel, as they allowed Sevilla to comeback from 1-0 down to win 3-1. It was a difficult result to take after a wonderful European campaign and a first-half performance that promised so […]
10 years ago

Coutinho deserves a medal for not punching this fan in the face after the final whistle
There’s a time and a fucking place. After a thrilling Europa League campaign which included some of the most glowing highlights of Jurgen Klopp’s first season at Anfield, Liverpool failed at the final hurdle and lost 3-1 to Sevilla. The players in red were understandably devastated at the final whistle, as were the thousands of Scouse […]
10 years ago

Liverpool’s Danny Ings proves he’s a great sport after ‘fans’ don’t recognise him
God bless Danny Ings. The Liverpool striker is something of a favourite here at JOE towers, partly for his frankly heart-warming kind deeds, but also for his weird and wonderful videos. He may have suffered a serious injury this season but it has never affected his sunny disposition or good humour. That was evident again this week […]
10 years ago

15 brilliant women we wish we were mates with
Fancying someone is fine, but that’s not what this is about.
10 years ago

Expect wily old Fergie to praise Jose Mourinho any day now
Everything Sir Alex Ferguson says and does is for a reason. To suggest otherwise is not to know the great man at all. The legendary Scot is conniving, disingenuous, manipulative, and quite often shameless. Now, as in his glory days as the greatest manager of them all, Fergie uses words with the clinical accuracy of […]
10 years ago

The curious case of Sky Sports’ 3-minute u-turn on the futures of Van Gaal and Mourinho
This is a strange one, so please bear with us… Just after 4pm on Tuesday afternoon, Sky Sports News tweeted a video filed by their northern correspondent James Cooper reporting that Louis van Gaal was due to remain as the manager of Manchester United this summer. It was from a segment that had aired on the channel earlier […]
10 years ago

The Zlatan Cometh? Why Ibrahimovic to Old Trafford is strangely perfect
An obscene £150,000-a-week for a one-paced has-been mercenary who will be 35 years old in October. In many ways, Zlatan Ibrahimovic’s touted move from Paris Saint-Germain to Manchester United this summer seems typical of the Old Trafford club at present. An expensive ‘marquee’ signing whose acquisition would be on reputation alone and look very much like a […]
10 years ago

Troubles that only balding men will properly understand
The buck stops hair.
10 years ago

Sky Sports’ David Garrido shows off epic dad-dancing during Sheffield Wednesday playoff celebrations
He’s got the moves.
10 years ago

Sky Sports do their best to ignore that Jamie Vardy is on the cans
How’s about this for being economical with the truth? God love Sky Sports. Since 1992 they’ve been doing their best to portray a somewhat sanitised version of football for the masses to consume at their leisure. And fair dues, they’ve helped popularise the sport. But some things are obvious to one and all, so there’s […]
10 years ago

We asked you to describe Game of Thrones in 7 words or fewer and the replies are sublime
Well played you lot. Whenever we call upon you for inspiration, you very rarely let us down and for that we are extremely grateful…mainly because it means we can just share your funny stuff rather than thinking of our own. We all know Game of Thrones is something of a cultural phenomenon that transcends its […]
10 years ago

Liverpool fans are seriously man (and woman) crushing on their dishy incoming goalkeeper
This lot need to have a cold shower. It’s fair to say that most Liverpool fans have been praying for a new goalkeeper for a while now. Current number one Simon Mignolet does have his moments of inspired stopping, but he’s just as prone to as many brainfarts. So it will come as a huge relief to […]
10 years ago

There’s a buzz about Man United’s new bee-inspired third kit
Comb and have a go if you think you’re hard enough. There have been previous computer-generated images of Manchester United’s third kit for season 2016/17, but this is the first time we’ve seen an actual real-life photograph of the forthcoming white design. Adidas’ new template for all their new kits sees their iconic three stripes moved from […]
10 years ago

Everyone is laughing at the absolute farce at Old Trafford following fake bomb blunder
What a farce
10 years ago

Man United ‘bomb’ was a prop from a training exercise that was accidentally left in the toilets
If this is true, it is extremely embarrassing for Manchester United. Whilst everyone was commending the club and its security staff for the swift way in which they dealt with the potential bomb threat, it now seems that they may have been inadvertently responsible. The Daily Mail’s Mike Keegan reports that the ‘incredibly realistic’ hoax […]
10 years ago

Confirmed: Manchester United vs Bournemouth will go ahead this week
The show must go on. After Manchester United’s final game of the season with Bournemouth on Sunday was abandoned due to a bomb scare, the game has swiftly been rearranged for this week. Although the suspicious package that caused the abandonment was later found to be a very realistic hoax, the club and the police […]
10 years ago

Ryanair flight from Norway to Manchester evacuated due to bomb alert
This is a worrying development on an already unsettling day. On the day that Manchester United’s Old Trafford stadium was evacuated due to a bomb alert, that turned out to be a very realistic hoax, a Ryanair plane bound for Manchester have been evacuated to due to a potential terror threat. According to Norwegian news agency Dagbladet […]
10 years ago

Arsenal fan criticised for offensive tweet about Sikhs after Man United bomb alert
Sunday was an incredibly tense day at Old Trafford. A matchday that started with Manchester United fans hoping that their result against Bournemouth at home and Manchester City’s game with Swansea City at Liberty Stadium would somehow allow them Champions League football next season, ended up watching no football at all. That’s because a suspect package – that […]
10 years ago